On the Eve of Fate

{Goodbye 2010! I will miss you sorely: all that you were to me, yet so much you have taught me forever. Greetings, 2011!!! :D}

I am a person of lists. If there was a list for life (long though it might be), I would be one of the dorks racing to read it.

That's not to say that I'm good at following the lists. Checking things off, conquering projects, and reaching goals makes me hugely accomplished (which is why list-making is so very helpful). But you can't live by a list. It's like living by the law: it just won't work.

Be that as it may, almost every single New Year's Eve (or several days prior...) I grab a notebook and scribble down the changes I want to see in myself - my New Year's Resolutions. Then I type up the finished product in some snazzy fonts, print off a couple of copies, and put them around my room.

Usually, three months later, I've lost all or most of the copies. I also have scratched off approximately one thing from the list.

Next year rolls around, and I can't even remember some of my so-called resolutions.

And yet, I'm going to do it again this year. Why? Because it helps me to get my thoughts down on paper. To really identify what's important and what's not. Maybe I don't have enough resolve to carry out my resolutions, but at least I've tried.

But this year is going to be different. This year, I'm going to fully acknowledge, to myself and my faithful readers, that this "resolution" list for 2011 is going to be secondary. Secondary to one thing, one phrase, one thought, one idea that I'm praying transforms every part of me into someone I can no longer recognize:

"Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." ~ 1 Corinthians 10:31

Everything. All. Whatever you do.

Those are incriminating and binding words. They're iron chains of truth that cannot be dissolved by time or desires or human power. And you know what that means? It means giving myself, body and soul, to the One who will never let me go.

My heart.
My soul.
My dreams.
My plans.

Everything about me that I don't want to lose is going to be given up. For, "He who finds his life will lose it, but he who loses his life for My sake will find it."

ZEAL: fervor; eager desire or endeavor; enthusiastic diligence; ardor; passion.

This is my dream for the New Year. Ushering in 2011 with a fire burning inside of me, a flame unquenchable. For if He is for me, who can stand against me? If I have His love, whose other favor do I need?