Meaning

I haven't posted in a while =X Tape my mouth shut and cut off my fingers (I have my crazy friend Abby to thank for the thoughts of dismembered appendages :P).

Or something.

My life has been a crazy mess of mixed-up feelings (oh, the deceptiveness of emotions...) and random events lately. There are little daily trials, joys, triumphs, and failures, but I forget them as soon as I sit down to type.

It's hard to find the meaning in my days, sometimes. Ever feel as if you're chasing yourself in a little circle, unable to break the cycle of being what you hate? Ever wished you could do something stupid, destructive, or just plain dark in order to feel as if you could put your mark on the world?

I know you're probably thinking, "There goes Caitlin, being all dramatic again..." Yes, call it drama, or depression, or being emo, or whatever you like, but it's just me. Letting my feelings bleed out onto paper (er, the screen). It's kind of therapeutic for me to write about what I'm going through.

But I'm sure you're quite bored ;). Anyway, back to reality. Here it is: what I'm going through is both significant and insignificant. God is what truly matters. Everything else is just dust bunnies cluttering up the room.

Goodnight to all! In the cold night, think on your life. Think about what matters. Because, while no one is opposed to going caroling or buying friends and relatives Christmas gifts, most people are afraid of putting their lives in God's hands...

[If none of this makes any sense, that's okay. Be comforted in the fact that I will probably wake up tomorrow, read this post, and be just as confused as the rest of you. If, however, you have gained insight/meaning, then I am humbly pleased that God is working through me <3]